Hey, why did he play that card anyway?
Good morning Nooorrrfooolkk!!! Yeah, Robin Williams did it better. But in anycase, I bet you think it's odd I'm doing another movie review, huh? I don't know, maybe my computer going down has slowed me playing all those online duels to make my informative Yu-Gi-Oh articles. Maybe I like to use movies reviews to convey my messages about society so I don't sound like a preachy, crazed old man at an random internet street corner, or maybe I just want an excuse to write something so shut your face. Whatever the reason, the movie of the moment is Knives Out, which was essentially pacifist James Bond vs evil Captain America with a maid as the referee, and I loved every minute of it. Well... that description actually doesn't do the movie justice: It was actually about a Hispanic maid whose good-willed character allows her to overcome the corruption of an affluent family, all tied into a brilliantly woven murder mystery, with pacifist James Bond vs evil Captain America happening on the side. Now, on to the meat of this article... Because this movie was a murder mystery, I can't go into what I loved about the plot without spoiling you like an only child during Christmas, but what I can do is talk about a specific aspect I appreciated the movie did right, taking into account the climate of female empowerment consuming popular culture currently.
Now be gentle while you read this article, especially because I'm all for female empowerment, or any movie showcasing a minority underdog swimming through the ugly of life and emerging first out of the pool. You can look for further evidence in my novel Elements: The Epic of the Elements, with my two strong female protagonists Takedako and Venus. What I don't appreciate is when one group is villainous or demonized to make another one look better. This was my primary issue with movies that did the female empowerment theme wrong, and were seriously berated by critics and fans because of it, my prime examples the 2016 Ghostbusters remake and Star Wars: The Last Jedi. In the former, all the male characters were bumbling idiots (with poor Chris Hemsworth becoming quintessence of the dumb, pretty-boy male stereotype), while in the latter every pale-skinned white male was either incompetent or evil. However, Knives Out managed to avoid this trap by not only having a female character overcome adversity, but by showing the good and bad present in all groups present in the film. There are female antagonists in Knives Out, as well as male antagonists. It shows the negative side of the wealthy, while it also shows the positive, altruistic side of it. As a result, it gives everyone their "fair share" by not trying to stereotype a particular group as the antagonist to raise another, a lesson Hollywood needs to learn if they want stop the populace from throwing rancor on newer, female-centric films. It's not making the main cast female that makes a movie bad (another negative stereotype that needs to disappear), but it's the way the films are being directed and/or written that's making them bad, by Hollywood thinking one group needs to be under the heel of another for the next to rise, instead of having both groups lift each other up in harmony. Knives Out proved the recipe worked by crafting a film few fans and critics have issues with while it stars a female protagonist as the lead.
First of all, sorry for not posting for awhile guys. For those who still remain to check this bad boy out, you are the few, the proud, and the brave, and the Mist thanks you by granting you a complementary hug from a Mist (Just go out and put your sweaty arms around the nearest cloud you see. I promise it won't bite ^_^) and a warrior expedition with a Warrior Falcon, coming... Next time you dream about one. In all seriousness though, my computer rage quit on me, so I've been lax in the blog makin', yet here I am, with another one, just for you ;).
I've decided to do something different this time, and not talk about Yu-Gi-Oh or politics, but a movie, and what better way to kick off the Halloween season than to talk about a movie featuring a comic book, homicidal clown pushed to the brink by society? There were a lot of positives about the movie, including its commentary about the mentally ill in our society (something I've touched on before. You know, the whole anti-social personality thing bursting out of control due to us diving into our technology like eager kids jumping into a half-empty pool without a life guard) and the income disparity and how it causes strife between economic classes. In short, the movie was DEEP, and I'm glad Disney doesn't have its hands on Time Warner to mass produce more money making blockbusters with the shallowness of a river in the Sahara (Half joking: The Disney-Marvel movies are great, entertaining movies, but you CAN'T say the most thought provoking super hero flicks came from the Mouse House). The true question is: Is it worth the hype? Well... Yes and no.
The movie is worth the hype because it's not just a good quality movie, but an entertaining one. The movie builds itself and atmosphere with meaningful lessons touching on controversial issues in our modern society, which makes it a good quality movie, just like the best books are ones relevant by giving us a snippet into the social strife and issues of its time's publication. Joker is entertaining because of its suspense, and I mean Alfred-Hitchcock-and-Joel-Schumacher-love-child levels of suspense. The movie plays with the Joker's level of psychosis to make him a truly unpredictable character, to the point where you're always uncertain of his actions, what's real in his mind, and what's real in his life. In a way, Joaquin Phoenix creates one of the most unpredictable Jokers you'll ever see, while at the same time making him as relatable as possible, a performance that will leave you leaning forward in your seat, despite the film's slow pacing.
Okay... Now on why Joker DOESN'T deserve the hype. All this negative press... I mean, was it really necessary for the U.S. military to warn the public about possible shootings from the Joker movie? I can't think of a single movie about bulling or the killing of police officers (or of some police officers killing innocent people) that caused a warning to be released. Does anyone remember a such a message being released with The Matrix when Morpheus said anyone in the system could be an Agent, so collateral damage was fair game? Or how about in the School Daze gun scene? Or how about the Punisher series, where an ex-military officer becomes a vigilante and kills criminals without a trial? Do you want to know the biggest difference between those movies and Joker? The primary targets for the violence isn't government agents who can become anybody, or bullies, or criminals denied their due-process in court, but the rich and powerful. The scares for the Joker movie are not only unwarranted, but in part prove part of the message the movie presents: The safety and care for the every-man gets ignored, but when the rich and powerful are threatened, an immediate reaction is seen to counter it, even if the threat comes from a fictional character in a comic book movie.
So, in conclusion, The Joker movie is definitely worth dat hype, but not that automatic rifle you have in your trunk, the concealed hunting knife and pistol tucked under your belt, and the real bulletproof vest your sporting (How in the hell did fake bulletproof vests become a fashion statement?! I... I just can't sometimes.)
Oh, and I lied, I am going to talk about Yu-Gi-Oh: SUCK IT CHAOS-GUARDRAGON! SUCK IT ALL THE WAY HOME!!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
*Sigh* got that out of my system. In anycase, happy hunting out there, and remember to stay safe, but not from comic book movies. They're not going to kill you; mentally ill people ignored by the government and you because you're only concerned about yourself and not the well-being of your fellowman might though, and this movie, as we've been seeing in the news for the past few years, will have nothing to with that.
Yugioh rulings, or, as a matter of fact, rulings period, can be the greatest bane and blessing in any game, whether it’s on a console or a tabletop. For example, you’ll thank your Egyptian god cards Meta Knight and Garchomp with Sand Veil were banned from tournament play in their respective franchises, but you’ll become dead-eyed after I tell you a judge one time told me Apex Avian’s negation could not respond to Monster effects, period (And I had to play the rest of the tournament like that, because then I was a wide-eyed hopeful who didn’t know anything).
Today I’m finally getting around to addressing a controversial ruling not made by a single judge in a comic shop, but, presumably, a panel of judges at Konami in April of 2019, the ruling more controversial than the Flash honestly competing against a group of 1st graders in a foot race. The specific wording is as follows:
This translates to a lot of cards losing their viability because they count on all duelists to play with honesty and integrity, qualities any player who as stepped foot into a comic shop knows runs in handfuls rather than spades (Yugioh was almost banned from my high school when a novice lost an expensive card to a pro whom challenged him to a “friendly” game for it, and we’ve all heard stories of Infernity players “accidentally” setting Monsters in their Spell/Trap zones). The largest casualty dealt with Mind Crush, a card now relying solely on your opponent’s honesty to be usable, considering neither you nor a judge can verify the cards without reasonable suspicion one’s opponent is cheating (like if they’re dumb enough to use the card right after you tried dropping it.). Some duelists theorize the ruling’s creation stemmed from Time Wasters (still hate those bastards…) who run down time in professional settings to stall for victory. This seems to make sense… but I’ve theorized another possible reason for this mostly unbalanced ruling change.
Imagine, if you will, running one of the many cookie-cutter, highly hated OTL (One Turn Lock) decks, and you use Mind Crush or whatever to verify your opponent doesn’t have the target card in their hand. You now know exactly what your enemy can do and can set-up to negate their strategy perfectly. Nothing but Spells in their hand? Make Naturia Beast to end the game or play Number 38 to give them a hard time. Fighting a deck with monster affects like proximity mines? Swing away with Utopia Lightning or another monster that halts battle phase effects. See the potential of a Control deck in your enemy’s hand? Sit on a monster unaffected by card effects (It’s scary how many of those exist now…) and laugh your way to victory. I could go on, the point being the negation-set-up, current style of the game makes knowing your opponent’s hand no longer knowledge granting a slight edge of insight, but a kill-skill easily granting one victory. In my opinion, it may not have been the “best” way to fix the problem, but it’s the method the Konami board of whatever decided.
Or maybe all of our speculation is complete bullshit. Maybe a Konami judge of the highest degree copied Raymond Dai’s Spell Striker deck, but drew a hand full of hand traps + one Engage while facing Wind-Ups or Aqua Chorus Beatdown. His opponent used Mind Crush and called Engage, causing the judge to harbor a passion and ever-boiling hatred for the card that eternally disgraced him. I’m just a writer, but you’ve been a great audience. Peace Out…
There are many things I could talk about: I could talk about the ban list and how I think it needs to be adjusted, I could talk about how it’s been months until I last blogged but defend myself on the other projects I’ve been working on, or I could talk about the validation behind the newest, controversial Yu-Gi-Oh tournament policies in the current negation state of the game. As a matter of fact, I think I just created 3 different reasons why I shouldn’t run dry on my next three blog posts… What I am going to talk about, though, is something that offends me “personally” as a duelist in the TCG. As the title of this blog implies, I am very connected to Wind monsters, as in Poison-Ivy-of-Batman-plant-love for Wind monsters (Yes, I think I will write a fanfic on this). They were my first Yu-Gi-Oh love since I watched Mia summon her Harpies in the anime and when Empress Mantis with Rising Air Current was my boss combo, so I naturally keep an eye open for any new Wind monsters or Wind archetypes in the TCG, OCG, rumors, and beyond. What I have seen as of late, especially with the new Simorgh support, is not very encouraging.
To put it simply, this “modern” Wind deck has as much synergy as a peanut butter-tuna sandwich with bacon as bread. The two new Big-Big Birds (Not to be confused with Mist Valley Apex Avian, the OG Big Bird), effects only happen in response to a Spell/Trap card activation or effect (Yup, they don’t stop Monster effects at all) and while Darkness Simorgh negates Spells and Traps completely by tributing a Wind monster, Simorgh Lord of the Storm spins a card (meaning returns from the field to the deck) when Spell/Trap card effect is activated. Now, my question, what freakin’ card in the deck goes with this strategy? Sure, you have nearly endless effect fodder on your turn, because most of the Simorgh Spells/Traps can be banished to reduce the level of a Winged Beast by 1 in your hand (We will get to the problem with THIS shortly…), but what about during your opponent’s turn, when you’re trying to stop them from setting a U.S. military level defense of beatsticks and negators on their field? No quickplay Spells or other Traps exist in the archetype to disrupt your opponent’s monsters. It seems Wind monsters must permanently flop around with one wing like a bird just escaping a chicken factory, because ALL Wind decks have this problem… Where they’re designed to either A. Disrupt Spells or Traps (Herpies, the Simorgh Lame Peak, some crap in Gustos) or B. Monsters (Some crap in F.A.s, Trap Beasts with Priests, The Fart heroes of PETA) but never C. For the love of Apex Avian, BOTH. But I’m getting off topic… None of the Spells or the single Trap add synergy to the Big-Big Birds' effects.
Then there’s the little guys, Simorgh’s tiny fan club, two of which are as useless as a mute parrot (Protection and Beginnings), two others as useful as finding a piece of gold in a silver counting contest (Endings and Summoning). Why, for the love of Apex, could not, these freakin’ birds, GET THEIR EFFECTS WHEN THEY ARE SUMMONED, PERIOD! Would it have really been too much to ask? Are we talking Tier 0 Dragon Ruler or Yata + Before-Errata Envoy of the Ending levels if it had happened? You could still have kept the once per turn thing, but at least the little guys could have got their effects off when they Specialed from the Graveyard. They’re already limited by not being able to self-revive if your opponent has a Spell or Trap in their respective zones (I was testing the deck and my opponent just set a single Spell or Trap when he ended his turn, and I didn’t have a lame Bird of Protection in my hand, because who the hell would run that? Nor did I draw Simorgh Rejection. I nearly busted a gut laughing my butt off.) Again, this lack of synergy had me bashing my head against my Mist Valley Shrine. If your birds can come back from the Grave but get banished afterwards, at least have them do something for it. Have them come back in attack position, have them all be the same level so you can Xyz and circumvent the whole banishing thing, make one a tuner so you can Synch, just something other than be fodder for either your opponent’s attacks or your Big Birds' effects.
The last aspect lacking synergy in the deck I’m going to discuss here is the relationship between the Big Bird levels and the Spell effects. It’s great we have a searcher with Simorgh Arrival (could be better, but I’ll take it) and a poor man’s Harpy Feather Duster that’s a bouncer, Simorgh Rejection… then you have their effects that reduce the level of a Wind Monster in your hand by 1 by banishing in the Grave, while your Big Birds are all level 8… This means in order to easily summon a Big Bird (the overall purpose of the deck I might add), you have to either A. Have two of the Spells in the Graveyard, or B. Have a Spell in the Grave and the Field Spell. Why not make the Spells when banished… I don’t know… have the same effect as the Field Spell?! Or just make all the Simorgh Big Birds level 7 instead of 8, so they would have better synergy with the Field Spell. It’s as if, when crafting Wind decks, Konami bakes a two-layer cake but only decides to use half the can of icing, they give a hair cut but only shave half the head while charging full price, or give a man trekking in a desert only half a bottle of water. When one sees the efforts put into other decks, one has to wonder what cackling madman in Konami’s staff has a Poisonous Wind card framed on his desk, errating all Wind monsters and support to fit his diabolical ends. Did his Blue-Eyes deck lose to Harpies in the 90s because his hand kept bricking? Did his beatdown strategy get unexpected thwarted by Gustos when he was about to enter the 3rd bracket of a Regional qualifier? Or did someone in a falcon mask piss in his oatmeal on a Saturday morning?
In anycase, I won’t deny some good things can be expected with the Simorgh archetype. The Field Spell; in the OCG called Elborz, Sacred Peak of Simorgh; is an outstanding addition to Winged-Beast/Wind decks, allowing a player an extra Normal summon of a Winged Beast monster if he or she controls one of the Wind variety, and it reduces the tribute required for the summon of a Winged beast in your hand (Granted you have a level 5 or higher Wind one in the hand). Simorgh Rejection is a Giant Trunade for your opponent’s cards in the Spell and Trap Zones, and all it takes is a two card-combo summon a 3200 attack spinner (Bird of Summoning and the Sacred Peak… And pray your opponent doesn’t have any Hand Traps). I was given some hope with the Pendulum era of Yu-Gi-Oh concerning Wind monsters. We had Ritual Beasts, Majespecters, Yosenjus, Windwitches, and Speedroids, it seeming like for the first time the archetype was getting some love. But none of these decks have adapted well to the competitive format. Maybe if Mist Valleys get some extra support (Honestly the Wind archetype we were all hoping would get the zombie treatment) we’ll finally have the red-eyed emu we all dreamed of riding into the Yugioh tournament scene. But even if this does happen, considering the game's pattern towards Wind-monsters, I’m not that hopeful. They’ll probably then limit or outright ban Apex Avian, or make the strategy as uncoordinated as the Little and Big Birds That Couldn’t.
On another, not bird deck related rant note, be sure to check out my latest article on how to create a competitive Dragon Deck. I give lizard-love to everything from the OGs Red-Eyes and Blue-Eyes to the Guardragons and Rokkets. Follow this link below to view it. Happy Hunting fellow duelists, and be sure to pack your Called by the Graves to stay safe from the Loli-Zombie Empire.
How to Build a Competitive Yu-Gi-Oh Dragon Deck... for those who dream of dragons, but don't image them (Because Imagine Dragons suck).
Another year brings new Yi-Gi-Oh challenges, and with that new cards to add to my lists of top ten cards everyone will abuse like the new cheapest brand of over-the-counter medicine that’s in low stock because of flu season. We had interesting things happen this year… Monster Reborn is back (I would have never guessed that would happen), Konami continues to push their loli-fetish on us by making the zombie girls staples for top-tier decks, Evenly Matched exists, and Solemn Strike NEVER got hit. As I make these lists, many people love to point out how A. MST is boss because it negates everything (Jking :P), B. I missed a mention for a card clearly more boss than the others, or C. My lists are purely subjective because a card might work better in another type of deck than another. So I’m going to respond here by saying: A. MST is boss but I don’t care you think it negates everything (still Jking :P. Grab Twin Twisters kids or go home), B. I might have missed your card (God, we know you make sweet babies with your Quasar Dragon love pillow at night, but keep it to yourself), but I most likely didn’t because better –ish exists, and C. I’m making this blog post to tell you how I make my lists as objective as possible despite… You being a quarter right.
It’s undeniable many cards work better, or rather thrive, in the theme they’re supposed to thrive in. For example: Eradicator Epidemic Virus will naturally only work in a Dark deck, Trickstar Reincarnation works best when aligned with 90s popstar group, and Solar Recharge only gives one a benefit in Lightsworns. However, where I create a distinction between cards great in a theme vs just great cards is in asking what cards perform best, given similar circumstances, across themes.
The greatest example I love to use is what I still regard as the best draw card in the game: Solar Recharge. From Dragons to Destiny Heroes, most competent themes have vacuum-heavy draw power or CIA-level search power. Most card-shuffling enthusiasts with an appreciation for spikey-haired protagonists can tell you at least five decks with incredible draw cards you wouldn’t use in any other deck, but all those cards have one useful, yet bland, effect in common: “Do this to draw two cards,” and that’s it. However, Solar Recharge ups the ante by allowing one to “Do this to draw two cards,” but also doing something to push forward the theme’s overall objective (For those fresh to suicidal priests worshiping a crusading dragon: it sends two cards from the deck to the Graveyard, which brings Judgment Dragon closer to blasting your field away). Barely any other draw cards do this, making Solar Recharge my pick for best draw card, until they create something that destroys a card on the field and lets you draw without discarding (Spell Strikers, frighteningly, come close to this). A similar case can be made for Eradicator Epidemic Virus. Yes, it only works in Dark decks, but a card disabling one from using Spells or Traps for three turns can be extremely damaging, especially with the option of deciding what to disable as opposed to being a static card disabling one or the other (Royal Decree, Imperial Order, Jinzo, Spell Canceller, etc.).
In moi’s conclusion, even if a deck can only be used in a certain type of deck, or if its influence is severely limited in most other builds, as long as it’s a powerful card outpacing others in its class, it’s going to get top grades faster than a brownnosing-student in an insecure teacher’s classroom. If you haven’t checked out my Top Ten Lists yet, please do ;). As I posted in previous blog a ways back, I hate lists, but everyone else loves them, so I’m obliged to write them. I can promise you this though: A heavy amount of time and research goes into my lists, and I am not stealing them from some unknown, struggling writer somewhere who dreams of getting a break (But my articles get stolen pretty often. Seriously, a site admin of a Yugioh forum actually stole my article one time. I had to give him one-for so he’d take it down…). You can reach my Hubpage articles by clicking on the appropriately named tab above. Take care, and have a nice life yallz! Now excuse me while I get my Grog Nozzle to complete my Gunzerker with a DPUH…
Cheers everybody, and Happy New Years! Boy how do regrets fly by… Looks like we have a new year, and a new year brings new challenges to our all-time favorite children’s card game. I’ve tested and crashed several decks these 365 days of existence, like Mecha Phantom Beasts (Why… won’t…. these awesome cards… fly!), Hieratics (Sniffles, I wanted these guys to work so bad), F.A.s (Would an in-theme swarming card be too much to ask for?), and Turbo Naturias (I miss people’s surprised expressions when they lost to this one), and constructed a few decent ones that may surprise you, like Ritual Beasts (You better target my green birdie, or I’m OTKing you), Amorphages (You gotta know how to train demonic dragons right), and Metaphys (Yeah, I’m dragging your butt to the 5th dimension with me). With Cryptids aligned with legions of the Nega-verse and a magical girl with mecha-suits fighting alongside pop-star pixies, you have to wonder where a Wind duelist is to stand this year. He’ll give you a hint with his list of New Year’s Resolutions:
I could have easily made this list a hundred, but I remembered the short attention span of the populace, so I shortened it to a meek 10. Stay tuned to my blog for more in the Journey As a Wind Duelist. What are your resolutions for this year as a duelist? If you feel inclined, share them in the comments below. Have a safe, Happy New Year from the Mist Valley Blogger, and Peace Out…
I thought the picture above was a good idea at the time... In anycase, what really grinds my gears today (Yes, Family Guy reference) is how it's been difficult to find a deck I can connect with. I mean, we have more Dark monsters than you can shake a Shadow Realm at (Danger! and Dark Worlds are creating an unholy love child while the Vampire Kingdom rises), but the biggest culprit is the endless rainbows of monsters that don't fit an Attribute or Type category.
The only thing the top decks in the game have in common right now is the name they share. The Fur Hire, Spyrals, Sky Strikers, and World Legacy are all a part of their own little clubs, making the age of great "decks" officially over. I honestly believe, after careful thought achieved from meditating breathless upside down in a DBZ healing tank, The Card Makers were trying to revert the game back to its older state, when you couldn't stretch a single card across themes to create unexpected staples, but it instead created the era of Support Engines. Pro players no longer take a deck like the Sky Strikers or Danger! or World Legacy and try to make them work; they take key components from these decks and combine them with key components from others to make something more potent than the original, like that guy you and I don't talk about who laces his new "product" with something producing unusual side effects.
Now of course this takes the game in a more unpredictable direction, where any two decks mixed together create a God mode waiting to be hit by the ban list later, but it creates something else as well, a disease I've recently acquired in the game I'm been trying to diagnose... until now: Lost Deck Identity Syndrome.
Lost Deck Identity Syndrome is more prevalent in the older players of the game, the ones who grew up on watching the anime where the style used in the show directly mirrored what you did in the game, but can still be seen in younger players hooked on the show first before jumping into the card game. It's not a disease of the Pros, who will create a winning deck even if they have to mix a legless cheetah with a blind swift to get it, but a disease of the Romantics of the game, the ones who have cotton-candy cloud dreams of their deck embodying what they represent as a person. One person might love dragons ('cause they're jerks), another bugs ('cause their weird), and another bird women ('cause they have problems). You can even get more sophisticated with it, and say you have players who love beatdown strategies ('cause they're jerks), mill decks ('cause their weird), or negation decks ('cause they have problems). Whatever one's fetish, Lost Deck Identity Syndrome becomes rampant in the community when the card makers are just trying to break the strategic mold of older decks to force you to buying what's new, or when someone in the design studio seems to have paper towels and a bottle of lotion set aside for a particular archetype (*Cough* *Cough* Dark decks).
I, for one, want to cure this now rampant disease. Many argued about the state of the game when Pendulums hit the scene during Arc V, but Konami pulled a hat trick on us by not making that format revolve around Pendulums. We still had fast Synchro decks, reliable Xyzs, and some decks that didn't need to use the Extra deck at all. We also had a myriad of strategies, including negating, swarming, beatdown, and got introduced to Tributing. But in this format, everything revolves around Links, as if Konami was desperate to get back control of their game again. The cure for this disease is so simple it's scary: Create more complete decks with greater variety, or release cards to buff previous strategies, or just do both. The writer has gained hope with the new Dragunity, Dark Magician, and Blue Eyes support, but why not branch things further? Let's make some more Amorphages, Mist Valley, Gusto, or Naturia support. Let's make archetype specific decks that win by milling, a win-condition (other than Exodia, because Final Countdown was boss), or a puzzle of a boss monster. Let's make the spirit of show reinfect our IRL heart of the cards. Or you can keep fighting against Dark World/Dangers! or Spell Striker/Trickstars across the table from TooPro31337 who keeps shouting, as he locks you out from the game turn 1, "Quit complaining, it's just a game. Pick a better deck." The choice is yours, really, but I've picked my side of That Grass Looks Greener.
Greetings everybody! I know it's been awhile, more like 4 months awhile, but I promise I have a good reason for vanishing quicker than that last girlfriend/boyfriend you had after they accidentally stumbled across your Bible Black collection. Those reasons are so debilitating, in fact, I can't quite share them here, but just know while I haven't been blogging, I have been creating. I decided to take a detour from my usual articles and set on a new path of discovery: What are the best decks given different attributes/types. Currently I'm on Attributes, but intend to float towards Types. I'm doing this not only because you guys seem to enjoy my lists more than my How to Beat Popular Decks series (even though my popular deck series is what put me on the map), but also to give me an objective so I don't wind up brain-drained when it comes to topics. So far, I've created a Best Wind, Fire, and Dark decks article, so please check those out when you get a chance.
I'd also like to note, despite me resorting to Lists, I still want you to retain something while reading my articles, so I won't be machine gunning them like some of my recent competition, meaning I'll still take time till fill them with knowledge and my own weird brand of humor. You know, at first I was just going to talk about how much I haven't blogged and apologize by doing figurative Japanese bows till my back broke, but I think I just discovered something I want to talk about: Freakin' Lists. I know you guys love them, but I, with my background as a writer, hate them, and I'll explain to you why.
Top 10 Bests Lists, the Best List, The Top 10 Things-They-Don't-Want-You-To-Know-Whatever Lists, are the intellectual equivalent of learning science by watching a Marvel movie. They're quick, easy, awesome eye-candy, and might have some fact or two to add some belief in their suspension of disbelief, but they're all a magic trick. How many of you actually remember most of the facts you watched from a Top 10 list, whether on Youtube or from a website (like Hubpages)? If those with photographic memories put their hands down, the answer is probably low, like 1 or two facts per lists. The reason for this, from my experience, is lists feed the need for people to get knowledge like one getting their fix for a meal from McDonald's. Just as fast food isn't a healthy means to balance one's diet, Top Ten Lists (or Top 25, or 50 Random Facts) aren't an effective way to improve one's knowledge, because they don't give one the memory foundation to retain the information. Think about it.
Your memory isn't built upon facts you just acquire by reading, but interconnected relationships between information that connects to more information, that link stronger between knowledge and images. Top Ten Lists just throw facts at you without creating a foundation for that relationship, something built naturally when watching a documentary or reading a biographical or informational text. Basically, a bunch of random, blended facts about a single topic will not create the memory foundation you acquire watching something that continuously builds upon the knowledge it's already giving you.
But the worst thing about these lists is how easy they are to make. I could literally Google level 3 Yugioh Monsters and put together a lists of 10 of those, call them the best, and Whalah! I have a Top Ten list! This adds even greater problems when one considers how easy it is to steal Top Ten Lists. I remember a popular Youtuber I used to watch religiously who created top 50 lists, until he got in a beef with another Youtuber. Unfortunately, my guy ended up on the butt end of the butt kicking, because the other guy exposed him for stealing his lists from lesser known article publishers, and my guy didn't even bother to change the order of the lists! Needless to say, myself a writer with a strong, very strong allergic reaction to plagiarism, I unsubscribed from the guy, and even though he released an apology and has since listed the sources of his articles, I haven't watched a list from him since.
So, the moral of the story here, ladies and gents, is I haven't written a blog post for a long time and I'm sorry, and I think Top Lists are the intellectual equivalent of binge watching Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo while eating twelve bags of candy with a gallon of soda on the side. I'm only doing them now because I now have competition who caught on to the cotton-candy dreams Lists provide. Just know I will keep writing my How to Beat Popular Yugioh Decks series, and will continue to provide some insight into this children's card game with a hint of humor and wealth of knowledge. Peace Out, and Happy Hunting out there.
Everyone knows the former trope: The Rage Quitter. As soon as an online match begins, you chuckle to yourself as you draw not a perfect hand, but one enabling you to do a decent combo. You lay out your field for your setup next turn, then end it, emptying your mind as to not negatively influence the probability of your opponent ruining your strategy. Then, like your significant other stopping you at the door after asking you to come over while his or her parents are away, the game message states: “CryBaby628 has surrendered,” and you’re sent back to the lobby. Or worse, you’re invested in the game for three turns, and have been getting your butt handed to you by your opponent’s plays. You have the perfect strategy to revive yourself from the ashes, the cards in hand to make it happen, but the opponent’s field is as inviting as a minefield guarded by a battalion of B-2 bombers. You then draw a Dark Hole, or a Raigeki, or a card able to disable the effect of that roadblock preventing your plays. You activate the card, begin your magnificent comeback, when, as if your significant other stops pleasing you right before you climax, you see the game message: “TooProToLose327 has surrendered,” and you’re sent back to the lobby.
Both of these scenarios are annoying as hell, and it is well known they hurt the community by not giving players an adequate opportunity to test their decks. After all, that’s the real reason online card playing communities exist, right? I would be willing to give a pass if a player told me, “Hey, I’m just testing this deck,” which lets me know one’s deck is crappy and one might quit if an egregious error displays in the build, but of course, most rage quitters don’t do this. They provide no warning and will jump off a building if they even see a sign of smoke to their strategy. Most people like to place the Hat of Crybaby on noobs, thinking they’re too immature to respect the game and its players, but us pros know many competent players who hate losing so much at the first sign of their cookie-cutter deck not winning like Leo Anaya’s did at Regionals will quit the game if so much as a sneeze of a challenge appears. The Yu-Gi-Oh online community is aware of these players, and has implemented several punishments for them (The original YGOPro I played reduced your online points if you rage-quit; YGOPro Percy forces you to play other rage quitters). However, I’ve become aware of a new type troll in the Yugioh online community, one that recently gained traction, especially in the online games not prepared to deal with them: The Time Wasters.
Stop me if you haven’t experienced this one before: You’re matching yourself evenly with another player, both of your decks bouncing off another’s strategies like fighters refusing to back-down in a brawl. One of these turns, you manage to get the upper hand, destroying a vital card your opponent controls or negating a play they try to make. You attack them for direct damage, then you end your turn, your palms sweating while waiting for a response. You wait for a minute, then five… then your opponent begins their turn. They summon a monster weaker than yours, set a Spell or Trap, then end their turn. You take the bait, attack their monster, nothing happens, then end your turn. You wait for your opponent’s to begin… for a minute… for five… then for ten. Do you see where I’m going with this?
Time Wasters, instead of quickly exiting the game once they’ve tasted some defeat, stall the game when they’re on the receiving end of a losing duel. Some take more time to make a decision, as opposed to their speedy gameplay displayed earlier in a match, while others will just abandon the game altogether… without quitting. In my opinion, I’d prefer a Rage Quitter over a Time Waster, because Rage Quitters, at the end of the shit-bow, only hurt themselves. They’ll either lose points for exiting the game or get punished by having to face other Rage Quitters, depending on what online game you’re using. Time Wasters, on the other hand, punish the other player as well by making them lose time they could have spent dueling a more cooperative player. Not only that, but if you’re in a ranked match, quitting while playing a Time Waster will make you lose points instead of them.
The first YGO Pro corrected this issue with the turn clock quickly diminishing if the turn player didn’t make moves, but there still wasn’t an adequate punishment for players who constantly stalled for time. YGO Percy, on the other hand, not only lacks a punishment for such players, but the turn clock is much more liberal than the original, making it a rampant ground for Time Wasters.
Game makers need to realize a Time Waster is actually no different from the Rage Quitter, the only difference between the two is Rage Quitters smash out of the program; Time Wasters walk away from the computer. The creator of online games need to have adequate punishments for both types of trolls, for they both have a means of ruining the online community for those desiring to enrich it.
As the hype died down from the Wave of Light Structure deck because it didn’t deliver the broken, Counter Fairy goodness we were hoping for (As you can see by reading my tiny bio on the right, I have a fetish for negating stuff, and even ran an effective Chaos Counter Fairy deck until Pendulums came and arched on my parade), we have a new ensemble to look forward to in the Lair of Darkness Structure coming to the TCG next month. With the deck focusing around Dark-themed monsters who must have the same ugly mothas as the Dark Worlds (or perhaps they inherited it from their Daddy’s side?), it’s pretty obvious its primary purpose is to serve as a counter to the Counter Fairies (Ha), and to create another interesting archetype vs archetype tie-in the Yu-Gi-Oh creators will never exploit (Would a spin-off series about the Duel Monsters world really be a bad idea?). At first, this new archetype honestly scared me nearly as much as the Patron Saint of all Liars himself, because I thought it was another “Up Yours!” to Wind monsters, but let me explain how I discovered my initial belief was proven wrong, and to help you not make a similar mistake…
The thing that scared me wasn’t the boss Darkest Diabolos with his immortal, cheap, hand destruction self, or his concubine Lilith, who speeds up any Trap reliant deck, but the Field Spell that put a dark shiver down my spine. The fact that it turned all monsters on the field into Dark monsters scared the-ish out of me, as if I just saw a rare fish and was about to say the word before someone punched me in the stomach and all I could say was “ish.” As if it wasn’t bad enough, the 2nd effect will be abused by any tribute reliant deck (Infernoids, here we go again…), I thought the 1st effect would be a big hit to Wind-monsters. Think about it for a second: No other modern decks, to continue their plays, have Attribute restrictions like Wind monsters do: For the Windwitches and Speedroids to continue their best plays, one is restricted to summoning Wind monsters for the rest of the turn. My first thought was if all monsters on the field become Dark, you would be unable to summon a Wind monster after the Windwitch/Speedroid restrictions, because all monsters summoned would be Dark attribute! Fortunately for me, though, a little research proved my theory incorrect.
I looked for a card similar to Lair of Darkness, the Field Spell described above giving all creatures affected twisted smiles and sadistic eyes, and found DNA Transplant, something having the first effect of Lair of Darkness. Then I looked up rulings for DNA Transplant, and I happened to get lucky from some other lost soul facing the same dilemma: Under previous Upperdeck rulings concerning Barrier Statue vs DNA Transplant:
Barrier Statue: Note that effects like “DNA Transplant” change monster Attributes only after they are on the field. So it has no impact on what monsters can be Special Summoned while a Barrier Statue is in play. (http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Card_Rulings:DNA_Transplant)
This means as long as the monster remains in the Green Club while squatting in the Extra Deck or in the hand, even with the restriction, it can still be summoned. Needless to say, I breathed a huge sigh of relief upon learning this, and consequently needed to change my blog post this week from a rant on how the Konami wigs are subliminally screwing Wind decks to how a little bit of research can save one a lot of heartache. Want a preview of what awaits in the Lair of Darkness? Take a look for yourself: